great body work….

Greetings, once again, my friends.

Many things have happened today.  I awoke in time to have a shower, do a bit of meditation while still feeling totally beside myself — I’m sure many of you have felt exactly like that.  Trundled off to the bank to get the almighty $$, then continued wending my way to Galen’s office for my well-needed body work (aka massage).  It took a long time to get grounded in preparation.  I was totally out of whack.

By 10:30am, I was near balance again, at least within myself.  I have many things to take care of, not least of which is some issues at my workplace.  But then…. who doesn’t?

Breakfast/lunch with Sam was a pleasure, as always.  I’m about to turn off the wheat consumption again.  Have been there for a week or so, and don’t like the results.  Bought a couple of new pillows and a new wok (Sam had asked for my old one) at Ross, and came home with some food from a new restaurant called Bento over by Jamba Juice in Loehmann’s Plaza.  If they continue their quality from today, they will be quite successful.  They make lots of trendy sushi, and many old favorites.  When I didn’t see futo maki on the pocket menu, I asked.  The sushi chef said, “Sure, I’ll make it for you!”  Mind you, it was the best Futomaki I have had in quite a while.  Got full on the salad, rice and veggies they provided with the tofu teriyaki and the sample and following order of kim chee.  Futo maki left for tomorrow’s breakfast!  The kim chee had an interesting flavour.  I asked the owner if it had ko chi chung (spelling?), a wonderful sweet pepper sauce.  He looked at me astounded and said that it did.

It was a grand late afternoon meal.  But the best was yet to come.  I wrestled with going to sleep early, in fact lay on my bed for a while getting restless.  I ventured out into the clay studio, which now has a new name — Clay House of My Blue Typhoon, named after an old movie I remember for a couple of lines, including “Cry for happy!”  If you remember that, you are as old as I am or even older!  Tea House of the August Moon.

So I was in the Clay House when I grabbed some new red clay and began a small pot in the Jane Osti style (remember her from Tahlequah?).  Then without even blinking an eye, started a larger pot, which you will all see in a subsequent show or online somewhere.  It’s one of those wait and build, wait and build — the waiting is for the clay to dry a bit and become stable before continuing.  So I built it as far as I could, came in the house and watched a film called The Year My Parents Went on Vacation.  Fascinating story in Brazil in 1970.  Try it.

I will use Jane’s style of building (which is actually the one I already use), incising with decoration, and then polishing prior to firing.  I am thrilled, and yes…. all you clay people out there know me and know clay and what it does for us.  I did only a small piece — pinch pot — week before last and haven’t touched the clay since then.  What a joy!  My hands and arms feel great.  

Tomorrow will bring time for laundry and more clay work.  I’m still working on the fabric commission I started before the trip, and have made great strides on it.  The fabric will receive attention.  It has not been worked on for one week, during this time of processing the life changes.

I’m going to the kitchen now to put away the remains of the dinner (tomorrow’s breakfast), and off to sleep yet again.  My life is once again coming into order.

Ta ta for now, dearies.  I’ll be in touch soon.

home — sick….

Well, I’ve been home for two whole days now.  The shock is astounding.  I made it to work on Tuesday, then again on Wednesday morning from 7 am until 8:39am.  Went home feeling so sick I didn’t know what had hit me.  All of my muscles ached; my knees, ankles, elbows and shoulders and one hip were screaming.  And all I wanted to do was sleep.  Was that an odd reaction to going back to work after 2 weeks or a real sickness?

I hit the bed, once again, and slept and slept and slept.  Got up for nothing except urination, a national pasttime for those of us in our late 50s.  I still feel as though I have a low grade fever, but suffer mildly from cold feet right now.  The only thing that is still really painful is my knees.  Still, everything feels best if I’m on my back snoozing in bed.  

Today’s fare was a true breakfast during the usual breakfast time, watermelon, and water.  I’m just too tired to cook.  Just moved my left wrist around and it, too, feels achy.  What is this?  And a few minutes ago I experienced the feeling of what people refer to as blowing it out your a__.  By the way there’s an interesting shop in one of the towns I went through last weekend….. in Medicine Park, Oklahoma, you should check out the shop here:  http://www.chapsmyass.com/

I removed three things from the suitcase today.  The little spoon that measures my herbs to make tea, the striped orange and white shirt I found at a store on Thursday before I left Tahlequah, and my large container of shampoo.  Yesterday I removed my hairbrush, nail clippers, and earring container.  At this rate, I should be finished by September.  May not have enough sick leave to stay off work until then, though.

I’m beginning to fade again.  Will have a familiar massage with Galen on Saturday morning.  Can’t wait to get myself back together.  

Off to bed — it’s only 8:49 here.  I am having jet lag trouble with this two hour difference.  It will go away over the weekend, I’m sure.  Having a craving for pizza — haven’t had cheese or white bread for several months.  Would like to try Chicago Fire soon.  May be next week.

Today found all the stuff I took out of my suitcase two (nearly three) weeks ago realizing I had overpacked. Smart mommy.  Clothing, beads for a new fabric piece, fabric for that new piece, electronic devices (computer related), and more clothing, including a bathing suit.  Smart move, it turns out.

I see myself at home again tomorrow unless I have a miraculous recovery between now and the morning hours.  Just nothing to draw upon right now.  

Empty, awaiting inspiration.

I want to write.  And I will.  If that’s ok with you!

Please wish me wellness, for I am home — sick….

Later…………..

Bonjour mes enfants….

Homage a la jour de gloire — Bastille Day en France.

Let’s all stand and sing La Marseillaise:

Allons enfants de la patrie…..

La jour de gloire est arrive….

Well, in midsong, I went to my bedroom, fell into my bed, and am just emerging from sleep, interspersed with a couple of slumbery walks to the bathroom after having drunk several glasses of tea at dinner.  My bed is THE BEST!!!!

Not planning to travel soon, especially on Expressjet air lines.  The woman across from me (I was in a single seat on the left side of the plane) and several others did not have anyone in their 2-seat right side of the plane seats.  She was sleeping with her feet up on the second seat, writhing around; call me jealous while I was sitting squish butt in the single seat trying to find a place for my feet.

I heard at the airport that the service from OKCity to Sacramento was going to stop soon-like next month. In line, they were referring people to other airlines for return tickets.  There were quite a few empty seats (drat!), so it must not be profitable even in summertime.

Just took a shower in my own bathroom.  Reconnected with my showerhead….such a lovely invention.  

Strange things that happen department:  went to the family cemetery that is overlooked by Mt. Scott outside Lawton, OK.  I looked at my grandparents’ headstone and noticed that we standing there on their wedding anniversary….July 13.  They were married in 1922.  Grandma was 15 and grandpa was 16, I think.  A funny chill went through me.  

Well, dears, time for me to go to work.  I have to get dressed and be there by around 7 so that I can anticipate my departure time of 3pm.  7.5 hours of who knows what today.  And I think there is a staff meeting also.   I can deal with it.

Thank you all for your support during the vacation time.  Maybe the next time I will realize what a vacation is prior to the second week.  My last actual vacation was in 1999.  Spent 3 weeks in Hawaii having found my half-brother there a few months prior.  

Later…..

au revoir, Oooooooo–klahoma

Well.  The day I thought would never arrive has arrived.  I am going to be in Sacramento in less than 24 hours. We experienced a bit of smoky air today, and I suddenly thought I might be in California.  Two of my relatives (maybe second cousins) are in California fighting fire.  One is in Redding.  Never been to California.  Can’t imagine fighting fire.  My brother did for one summer.  Once I asked why he didn’t put it on his resume.  He said it was a dreadful time and didn’t ever want to have to think of it again, especially in an interview for another position.

They just brought my dinner.  Totally covered with shredded cheese.  It was accompanied by a small plate on which I was supposed to scrape off the melted cheese.  The young boy serving me had no idea.  A young woman who served me the other night noticed me scraping away at the omlette. She said that she would have them make it over for me.  Very appreciative of detail.  Since I have not eaten cheese in several months, I am afraid of what might happen if I eat cheese.

Ok.  Now there is a family of six sitting near me.  The two tiny ones have the loudest childrens’ voices I have ever heard.  Now one thinks she’s playing with me and is trying to get my attention.  I’m trying my best to ignore her.  Her parents are not paying attention to her at all.

She screams, and screams and screams.  

I can’t stand it any longer.  Others have left or asked to be moved due to the screamer, and others have had no food for over an hour waiting, then something arrived and here are the frozen carrots!  The taco salad one woman ordered had only lettuce, sour cream and chips.

Guess I’ll wait to get to the airport tomorrow to do any answering of emails, or possibly of any writing here. The Tahlequah man asked why I write here.  Can’t I do journaling, he asked.  Isn’t that rather public, he asked.  

Dinner must be over.  The screams have started again.  I mean, really!!! It is 9:40pm and this is a 2 or 3 year old.  Can’t concentrate on anything else.  

I’m going back to the b&b and have a cup of tea or something.  

I’ll be more prepared to write tomorrow early afternoon before the flight.  Hot stone massage at 10am Monday morning at the b&b.  I’m excited!

Then I’ll be all squishy for the airplane ride.  Good thing it’s a nonstop.  I might just miss my change if there were one.  

Kids are starting to make noise again.

I’m leaving.

 

By the way, I smelled the sweet smell of the wheat just after a rain storm.

 

Later………….

IHOP now…

Well, dear ones, I am seated in an open 24 hour IHOP (International House of Pancakes for those of you who have either forgotten or live out of the country!) in Oklahoma City.

I feel squirrely, so will be going back to the b&b in a few minutes.  

Hope everyone is well, truly.

Need to leave.

So much to snooze about!

Later………..

goodbye tahlequah….

Goodbye you little city, with your weirdo men who walk happily in their undies

Goodbye you old women who think I would fit into your groups

Goodbye Illinois River who has been so rerouted and dammed

Goodbye clean air and green meadows

Goodbye mikey dee’s where I am still wifi-ing

Give me my Eng J and his specialties

Give me my little house — my home

Make me grateful for what I have.

Later, my friends.

Later……………….

at micky D’s again

Imagine me at mcdonalds twice in one day.  I was even going to go to starbucks, but the Tehlaquah store doesn’t have their wifi set up yet.  I didn’t go in this time.  Sitting outside in the car in the freaky deaky heat and humidity of 85 degrees at 8pm.  Not too happy that hostess has not had her techie stuff fixed so that I don’t have to frequent this hole.  And the lovely scents of the cars spewing out the icky stuff that the catalytic converters eliminate.  Give me California!!!!

I am going to view some smaller towns outside Sacramento as I have viewed Tehlaquah… with the possibility of moving.  I realized that if I do move, it doesn’t have to be forever.  Duh!

Off to Oklahoma City via Tulsa tomorrow morning.  Lunch maybe with cousin Andrea and her two kids (one newborn),  Then on to OKC to the best B&B in town.  Time for me.  When I get home on Monday afternoon, I will be ready for work on Tuesday.  Grateful for what I have.  Gratitude exuding.  Happy to be alive.

I have been put down many times since arriving in Tahlequah Sunday a week ago.  Didn’t realize it was happening until I started feeling like I did when I was married to my now-deceased ex.  This Tahlequah man has a darned awful attitude…. a negative one, at that.  It will all come out in the book.  He would like to be referred to by his real name.  He says he has nothing to hide.  Also, his attitude toward any relationship between me and him is that he says, “Everything went really well.”  After I told him that I really didn’t think there was any reason to continue communicating, he said that he was going to stay in touch anyway.  What a fart.

Enough about farts.  Let’s talk about farting.  Just kidding, however farting is such sweet sorrow.  

I’ll probably stop off here tomorrow morning on the way out of town, just to offer a little parting gift to the community.  Sent off some extraneous clothing this afternoon which leaves my suitcase available for other things…. like I don’t know what, but want to have an option.  Got some cds of local artists that I will share when I return.  I think I just need a vacation from time to time, and make it real!!!

Ok.  Eeeeeenuff for the moment.  Must find a map to see how to get to Tulsa in the morning.

Later, dears………..

I did not come here for the coffee…..

As I sit here in the Tahlequah Macdonalds, drinking a disgusting cup of coffee and munching on a cinnamon melt, the rain is still pouring down.  It’s been steady and pounding for nearly half an hour.  Started about 2 minutes after I got here.  There are still some dufusses (what is the plural of dufus?) coming in out of their vehicles to get early lunch. 

I did not come here for the coffee.  My B&B hostess is not a techie where her wireless connection is concerned.  And there’s been no connection for nearly 24 hours.  I cannot stay out of touch for very long. You know me, dearies.  So I found the only wifi in town other than knocking on someone’s door.  This is quite fascinating, though.  I just worry about when I run out of power.  Will they let me plug in somewhere? And this is not free.  I had to pay $2.95 for 2 hours.  At this rate, with the freaky rain storm, I may have to buy more time!  

Today was supposed to be go to the music store and look around…. then travel out to the Illinois River, to horseshoe bend to take some stunning photos.  Right now I don’t even want to go outside until it gets dry.

I’m ready to skip the family gatherings (a few at a time) on Saturday and Sunday, and just skip to the departure on Monday afternoon.  

I am incorrigible.  Sitting here oogling a young man – probably in his 30s – who has come in with two of his friends.  Seems they have each bought several hamburgers and fries, and are sharing them in some convoluted way — clear to them but unclear to me.  Should I ask?  And one is filling a huge cylindrical goblet with some soda or another.  They appear to be off a construction site near here.  I believe the rain will severely reduce the clientele for lunch here today.  

There are at least 11 people working right now; it is loud, confusing, and loud.  Oh, did I say loud? Beeping noises, chewing noises, a vociferous manager ordering people around.  And everyone knows everyone.  I like the small town-ness of this place, but now that it’s raining, I just want to go home.  

Observation: the rain has changed from pouring straight down to allowing the winds to move it slightly from one side to another.  A bit of a minor hiatus at this little moment.  I’ll stay here until the power runs down too low to go on.  Perhaps I will merely observe for that time.  Two maroon shirts at mickyD’s.  They took over the drive-through.

OK.  Power is in the red.  Got to go power up.  Power rangers.  Sam used to watch that.

Going to b&b.

later……….

Mr. Bigstuff…… not

Aha!!!!  Finally in the bed and breakfast.  Mary, the hostess, made some lovely blueberry muffins for me.  If they last until tomorrow morning for breakfast, I’ll be surprised.  So much for the no sugar, no flour of the past few months. These are exceptional.  Going to make a nice cup of tea in a minute.  And what better to have with tea than another muffin!

I’ll be leaving here on Friday morning, and will be in Oklahoma City on Friday afternoon.  Then on home Monday the 14th.  Hope to see a couple of relatives sometime over the weekend, and get a chance to see Mt. Scott in the Wichita Mountains where grandma and grandpa lived.

Sorry this is so short…. fabric work has me feeling good again.  What’s his name was such a poop in his undies all the time, I just got nauseated and went into a different room.  Now most guys look good in their tighty whities or their boxers.  This guy made me hate the male body.  My lord.  He thought Mr. Bigstuff was his name.

FTS.

How can I process this.  I’m going to do it, though.  Had a really good phone call from a friend earlier.  She is helping me out a bit.  Got me started.  I have until Friday morning when I leave for Oklahoma City….. at that time, I have to be prepared to meet with family…. if I decide to do that.

Ok.  Going to munch and drink.

A demain.

later……..

May go to the local acupuncturist for a treatment.  maybe…

ah, the relief……

Moving to a bed and breakfast tomorrow afternoon.  It will be a relief.  The lady who runs it is so nice; I feel very welcomed there already – went there on Thursday to check it out.  I’ll be staying in the room that is a converted greenhouse attached to the former garage.  Lovely and light when needed.  Dark and private when needed.  Thankful I came to my senses and decided to move out.

Rented a car on Friday —- it’s a black HHR.  So fun and so cool.  Took off yesterday afternoon into the wilderness north of here.  May do some traveling into Arkansas this afternoon.  I do so love driving and looking at the countryside.  This time, I’ll remember to take the camera!

OK J is off looking at some property that we saw the other day.  Hoping he’ll feel considerate and bring some breakfast when he returns.  Not holding out too much hope, so I made coffee to bide my time.  Had a few pecans (I bought – oh yes, I bought the coffee, too… he supplied the coffee maker).

I’d better go do something useful while I’m drinking coffee — like watching BBC America!  Don’t you love “You are What You Eat”?  And the Gordon Ramsey program where he goes to restaurants and helps them get back on their feet.  The British version is much better.

Ok….off to the telly.  I love a vacation.

Later……